:Vocalo.org

I am a Chicago Multi-media artist

- with a constant stream of projects, from abstract painting about the history of place, to electronic music about the history of time, to illustration, about the history of self.

Links to my fine art projects can be found at http://www.artreview.com/profile/JamesBeckman

a downloadable selection of my music archive can be found at virb.com/dreamlogicc

 

 

 

 

justin james - by justin hemmingson While i was in high school, i wrote music and played guitar for an indie rock band, Neotoma, based in the town of Northfield MN. Though my audio diet did consist of about 60% hardcore and metal, a good 30% was heavy in to jungle, drum and bass, early trance, and big beat. I bought a dr 202, and along with a digital piano, my guitar, and a four track, recorded my first 'solo' albums. 2 albums formed in this method between 1997 and 2002. I worked under the name dreamlogicc. In 2001, Neotoma broke up. I worked with former singer Brandon Aase on another ep of material, and then moved with him to Chicago in the summer of 2002 to begin our schooling at Columbia College. While i was in school, music performance was retired, and music making too. I still spent alot of time seeing punk shows in Pilsen and rocking out at the Fireside Bowl. Between that and my studies in photography and fashion at college the idea of me as a musician very quickly went out like wet fingertips on a birthday candle. well i couldnt afford school... and the Art Collective I had begun with fellow artist Jeremiah Barber, The Ante:room, was going quite well. I dropped out after a hella' bummer' deal and discussion with the financial people at Columbia College. I worked several part time jobs, and then landed a position, through an internship our art collective hosted, at the National Vietnam Veteran Art Museum. I fell in love with the work and the people there quite quickly. I worked for them for a couple years, learning to love the work more and how to move it about as well. i moved on to a job in the River North gallery district as a preparator for one of the best galleries in Chicago, Ann Nathan. By this time, i had been painting 'seriously' for a couple years, and felt quite honored and privileged to be working hands on with such amazing artists. unfortunately, I found myself injured one evening, returning from an art fair Ann Nathan Gallery had exhibited at, SOFA at Navy Pier. A truck backed up suddenly and pinned my ankle and foot against the concrete loading dock wall. while the initial injury pain subsided, a new, much worse pain took its place. CRPS, or Complex regional pain syndrome, is an uncommon chronic condition where the nervous system continues to send signals and react as though there is serious injury. This pain come on all at once, or can grow and ache intensely through the day. As time goes on, the pain worsens, in this case my foot became unusable, and virtually untouchable without hypersensitivity and pain. several months after my accident at the loading dock, i was diagnosed with CRPS. While unfortunate, it didn't dawn on me at the time just what was to come. I couldn't work at the gallery anymore, so I had to leave. I felt like a failure. A tarnished, dented tin. I would continue getting a fraction of my pay each week, and would have an intensive physical and pain rehabilitation program with the people at the Rehabilitation Institute of Chicago ahead of me. i couldn't afford my current living on a fraction of the pay, so i found myself out of Ukrainian Village and sharing what became the El Dorado Club with musician and mathematician Slava Balasanov. Rewinding a bit - the summer of 2006. Ah, the summer of 2006 {*_*}, what i now think of as sort of a 'summer of freedom' of sorts. My injury was at the beginning of November, and I was none the wiser, yay verily {#_#} I spent a great deal of my time outside the gallery grind with musical maven (and now owner of the H+Son fixed gear rim madness) Tzu Sing. We would cruise on our fixies all around the city - up to the Baha'i in Wilmette for meditation and conversation, then down the lake front and over to Wicker Park ("the Filter" days) to admire the beautiful people and enjoy the summer sun {@_@}. 'Tzu' was a dj, artist, and an expressive, excitable mind. He played a lot of minimal techno, and had an amazing knowledge of electronica. We hit the dance floor each night we could. The Empty Bottle free weekly shows were a staple, as were the transient spaces and events hosted by people like Psymbolic and Moment Sound. It was a golden, High energy summer. I was painting almost every day as well - big abstract scrapes on paper, or little diary-esque character illustrations. Suddenly there was no more dancing. not for a long time. I decided to fill the time out of work, off my feet, and off the dance floor with making music. When i wasn't making music, i was refining my small characters, building storyline, making small gouache paintings and drawings, along with the first characters that became the Shiku Garu illustration and event series. all the time off my feet - out of the scene, my bike, my transit, severely restricted, quickly got to me. I was anxious to get back to my job, friends, and mobility and starting to get nervous about the recovery time. My care, as well as rent, food, medications... was (and is!) 'taken care of' by Travelers Indemnity Insurance. ( j beckman isnt my 'real' name' {^_^}) i say 'taken care' like 'that' because it has been quite a stretch of the term {>_<} Each doctor, each doctor appointment, each medication, med adjustment, phone call and bowel movement has to be given the ok, then the payment ok, by Insurance. That was fine for the first few months of the injury. but as things dragged in to the spring of 2007 the cooperation vanished in to thin air. Doctors weren't getting payed. The initial emergency room bills were overdue. Things that were implied suddenly weren't. Things that were said suddenly were irrelevant. the final spring 2007 deadline for the RIC Chronic Pain Management intensive had passed, and i was in... kind of. As would happen multiple times later, i walked in to a health specialty institution - a little nervous about what would be in store, but positive. The attendant informed me that I couldn't start the course, and that I would have to apply for the highly coveted spot again in September {#_#} By now, the CRPS pains, that had begun along my tendon and right side of my foot had grown to encapsulate the rest of my foot and toes, and radiated up my leg. Each step ranged from mildly unpleasant to downright impossible. I had to use a cane, sometimes two or crutches to get around, not to mention the ever rotating adjustment of Nervous system medications, pain meds, anti depressants, back pain meds, and many more that i went through in order to be able to function beyond leaving my tiny, closet sized bedroom in Pilsen. to dilute and disrupt these intensely negative elements, i found myself meditating and drawing, often in the same sitting. More and more Shiku Garu Project pieces came out during those sittings, hundreds more. I hand drew and painted several hundred stickers in the months of march and july alone. Each had a simply drawn feminine face, often with spirals on her cheeks or green bubbles emanating from her woozy gaze. It was the 'sick girl'. She was everyone, really. She was the individual illness, the collection of stalactites and stalagmites that form over ones lifetime, cluttering our brain with the calciums built up from personal triumphs and disasters, intimate hopes, dreams and desires. i produced tons and tons of work, and in a joint effort with flatmate Slava, we hosted Shiku Garu #1 (the birthday party) in the spring of '07 at our place, a sprawling complex dubbed 'the El Dorado Club'. I played my first live electronic music performance in six years, and a half dozen other live pa musicians played too, each one filling our warehouse-like space with their unique sound. Video artists projected all about the room and across the gear table in multiple projections and small monitor screens. the lax attitude towards smoking in the very large, but enclosed space gave the video projector lines an extra dimension, and made the whole thing look like an underground club in blade runner. it felt really good to put together that event with Slava. Until the fall of 2008 we would continue to host underground electronic music events at el dorado. But aside from the nervous success of the event and my art practice, i grew more uncomfortable. The presence of daily pain was like a water drip torture. Every interaction with the insurance company seemed (and seems!) designed to break me down - prolonging each approval - bait n' switch - doublespeak. my large work grew darker and more ominous. while i wasn't drawing ShikuGaru i was painting. barren, cold landscapes faded in over the the seemingly aloof and lighthearted imagery of the ShikuGaru. It rained a lot that summer. And more than that, it rained in my studio too. I had a very, very cheap apartment. literally a hole in the wall living space. the amount of studio space was amazing, but the landlord wasn't in to maintenance... i experienced many physical and emotional breakdowns and derailments during this time, and rain, or rather, toxic water thats soaked through a rather old building, was not a welcome sight {%_%} i caught the water in buckets and used it in a series of paintings about the space. Then, i packed a suitcase with one outfit, and as many liters of paint, papers, materials, and other supplies i could jam in, hopped on a bus, and spent a month in Minnesota. My parents were off to mission work in Peru, and i had a place to stay {!_!} and the company of Gretchen, the family mini schnauzer {@_@} For a long summer month, it was just me and old Gretchen having a chat each eve on the much lauded back deck, and it was just the treatment i needed. I made quite a bit of artwork while i was there. Photos, music, paintings, random cornfield installations, i really 'lost it' and 'found it' during this time of isolation, and it couldn't have been a better thing for me. I came back to Chicago energized and fresh. I still had pain, but the month of consistent meditation, Minnesota calmness, and immersion in art left me feeling refreshed and determined to move forward, rather than dwell in the past. Shiku Garu #2 was a few weeks after I returned from Minnesota. I had made many more drmlgcc songs, painted stickers and had added a limited run of shirts to the 'take away art' aspect of the project. The event went very well. We held it at Happy Dog Gallery in Wicker Park, rather than el dorado, and it turned out to be a good move. Slava and I hosted several parties together over the next year. Two more Shiku Garu events happened in October and February of 2008. In May of 2008 the German Net label Tonatom released the first dreamlogicc album in many years - Machines And Metaphors. Building on, I was able to play a series of radio shows and events that year. 2009 has gathered more energy still. music festivals in Minneapolis, numerous live shows and much more has kept my mind off the pain that came close to stopping me in my tracks. Insurance still chooses to delay, miss pay or not pay my weekly disability, my doctors, or even my major medical procedures and im still walking with a cane. I am quite frustrated at that situation, (and it being so directly coupled to my physical pain!) but yay, verily, im working on it {"_"} ok. more later {?_?} this is all one shot, no editing, sorry {~_~}